Mental Fiber

Remember your childhood?

2008-12-01T18:23:00.002-06:00

Yeah. Aren't those memories fond? Remember that time your Dad kept you up until midnight making you practice multiplication flash cards because he couldn't accept that the son of an engineer would have trouble with math? Remember the constant fighting between your parents and how everyone would be tense and joyless and take out their anger on you so you played alone in your room with your legos? Remember how you didn't really have any friends because you couldn't really relate to them because they were busily focused on whatever cartoon or toy was awesome at the time and you could only think about how when you got home your sister was going to babysit you and you knew she was going to tickle you until you couldn't breathe and make you watch American Werewolf in London again? Remember that time you stood up to your dad and told him he had gone to far and paid for it with 3 hours of red-faced screaming pressed desperately against the wall trying to avoid the sting of his accusatory finger and inching towards the door? Ah... childhood. Where none of the damage is serious but it's all fucking permanent.

Goodbye people. I'm signing out.

The photo blog is still going and LOCI will continue when I figure out how to do it once pownce shuts down.

Whackly has left the building.

Who are these guys?

2008-12-01T11:53:00.000-06:00

This picture was recently rediscovered during our Thanksgiving pilgrimage back to the ole family homestead. We haven't changed a bit have we?!? Whackly, contrary to popular belief, my Mom didn't draw any devil horns on you or anything!

The other day...

2008-11-28T20:43:00.003-06:00

Some people apparently think I'm too dumb to notice when they are being condescending. I supposed, often times, I perpetuate this by pretending I don't notice. You will always have the upper hand on someone who underestimates you. However, I'm not really used to it happening all that often and that's why it stuck with me when it happened the other day. I was having an IM conversation with someone I know... someone who probably knows enough about me to realize I'm a know-it-all but probably doesn't know me well enough to know that I've actually read up on the subject I'm talking about most of the time and that I keep my opinions malleable in case additional information is added. I'm not some stubborn stick in the mud whose opinion is unreasonable and unchangeable. We were lightly engaged in a sort of "What I would do if money wasn't an issue." kind of conversation and they mentioned they would go to Jamaica. I mentioned I thought that was strange since it's not exactly a nice or safe place and the same tropical weather can be had in many much safer locations around that region of the world. The response I got was something fairly consdescending and culminated in an outright sarcastic "OK. You're always right. You always know." kind of comment.

Well, with good old Jamaica nestled between South Africa and Sudan in the list of the top 20 dangerous places on the planet, I would like to point out that this would be an good example of a time when you can cram it with walnuts.

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8 posts....

2008-11-28T13:00:00.002-06:00

In 8 straight posts (since Mezzo's last) by far the vast majority of the hits to this site are from me coming to see if anyone else has read it or left comments. I think that's an official sign that it's time to wrap it up. What do you think?

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Tomorrow is the first day of the end of your year.

2008-11-26T21:11:00.004-06:00

Thanksgiving marks the beginning of the end.
Between now and New Year's Eve your year will summarize itself in an all new, never before seen microcosmic clusterfuck of familiar shittiness; like ABCs primetime linup. Is everyone ready? I know I am.

Between now and 2009 I have every reason to believe I'll find myslef:

Unintentionally drunk.
Completely broke.
Totally swimming in money.
Completely broke again.
Annoyed with a family member.
Angry with a family member.
Drawing plans for a voodoo doll of a family member.
Feeling the hopeful beginnings of the stir of Christmas Spirit.
Disappointed at how Christmas just isn't as fun when you aren't a kid.
Attempting to live vicariously through my child.
Railing against the taint of consumerism.
Singing Christmas carols.
Wondering why in the crap I'm singing Christmas carols.
Feeling sorry for poor people.
Realizing I'm a poor person.
In the mood to give.
In the mood to take.
Punching a bell ringer.
Roughing up that gruff little fellow that thinks he has the right to look in my bag after I checkout at Wal-Mart.
Laughing at how idiots can't drive in snow.
Nearly crashing in the snow and realizing I'm an idiot.
Lying awake staring at the Christmas tree.
Pissed I was awake all night staring at the tree when I don't even drop tabs anymore.
Convincing myself that Holiday sales are a good time to buy stuff I can't afford at a discount.
Converting my buyer's remorse into anger.
Listening to at least one person I know make excuses for their DUI.

How's your Holiday Season shaping up?

All you need is spellchecker!

2008-11-22T00:18:00.001-06:00

Anyone can be a critic. Anyone can be an expert. All you need is a spellchecker and a 10 minute proofread.

I just read a review of Weezer: The Red Album (which was too vile to link to) that included pos-mens for some of the weakest songs on the album and actually had an entire paragraph dedicated to the 4th track, Heart Songs.

Heart Songs? Have you heard this song? Tito Jackson could eat 8tracks tapes and crap better songs than this sing. I really like the album. It's not as awesome as Pinkerton or The Blue Album but there are enough solid tracks on the album to make up for the Beverly Hills single (which still makes me hobo-stabbingly mad). Even though my overall opinion of the album is that it's quite good I can't believe anyone who would even pretend to know enough about music to critique and album for a publication (it wasn't some asshole's blog like this is) would be moronic enough to fall in love with Heart Songs.

Damn, people are stupid this week. They don't know elephants from rhinos, 320kbps mp3 from lossless, and music from Heart Songs. I can't wait for next Monday, when the world will realign.

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Netflix via 360 FTW

2008-11-20T15:16:00.007-06:00

Not yet in surround sound but in HD resolutions, Netflix and Microsoft have just fired the first ballistic missle in the new HD format battle. Small arms fire has come from Apple and a few other places around the web but nothing has matched the significance of yesterday's escalation.

Netflix has been streaming moves for a while. The selection isn't great (since the studios don't particularly like the idea) but you can nearly always find something you like in there. Microsoft has been renting downloadable HD content through xbox Live for even longer. As of yesterday Netflix has now added an HD section to their streamable movies. As of yesterday anyone with an xbox 360 and a Netflix account can stream movies direct to the xbox. The same selection problems exist but there are some shining stars in there. I don't think you have to have a 360 to stream the HD movies but it doesn't hurt the experience. Streaming these movies through the 360 brings Netflix streaming into the living room and into a comfortable movie watching venue without the hassle (and believe me, it is a hassle) of setting up an HTPC and without the troll like solitude of watching a movie alone, on your computer.

Bluray is still struggling to recover from its hard fight with HD-DVD. The question at the end of this sentence has been asked before but with Netflix and the 360 moving into the space there is nobody left who can doubt the validity of inquring "Who the hell needs physical media like Bluray discs if I can pay $15 per month to Netflix and watch all the HD I want?"

I haven't tried streaming HD from Netflix yet, making this post a bit premature. However, I'm just so damned excited by it all I can't hold it in. It is true that the 360 HD movie rentals did suffer slighly in the picture quality department when compared to Bluray/HDDVD. If Netflix has the same issue I would consider it forgivable considering the how fresh the product is. With a little time, a little maturity, a couple of victories under their belt, Netflix might be the weapon Microsoft uses to finally slay Bluray.

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OK. When the fuck did everyone turn stupid?

2008-11-19T21:38:00.001-06:00

Using both hemispheres of your brain, assess the information presented in this photo and tell me what animal this is. You may guess wrong and be forgive but there is one animal it clearly is not. If you guess that animal I will hate you.

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If it's going to be that kind of party I'm going to stick my dick in the mashed potatoes.

2008-11-19T16:28:00.001-06:00

1. Job Frustration
2. Aneurysm
3. ???
4. Profit!!!

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I woke up on the floor after I read this and my left eyeball was blood red.

2008-11-17T21:37:00.002-06:00

I think I completely stroked out.

I went to Microsoft's email support and wrote them to tell them that, even though I had followed all of the steps outlined in their procedure, I had not been able to recover my content drm. What they returned was a copy/paste of the sheet of instructions that had come with my refurb unit that outlined the instructions, I had just written to tell them, hadn't worked. I'm thinking there was a mistake, type, snafu in whatever process they use to txfr the licenses over when they ship a refurb unit. They're thinking about rainbows and fairy farts or whatever the hell it is people think about when they answer without reading the fucking question.

Hello,

Thank you for contacting Microsoft online support for XBOX. I am Ashley and I will be helping you today with this issue.

I understand that you would like to know on how to reactivate your premium content or to restore your Digital Rights Management (DRM) licenses after you receive your console back from being repaired. We appreciate your inquiry and we are glad to be of help.

If you follow these steps, you can access your content while you're not signed in to Xbox LIVE.

Note: If you exchanged your console at a retail store by using the retailer's return policy instead of sending the console directly to the Xbox Repair Center, these steps do not restore your licenses. In this case, you must do one of the following:

. Use the DRM tool found at http://xbox.com/drm

. Contact Xbox Support to have your licenses manually restored

To view the FAQ for the DRM tool, visit the following Microsoft Web site:

http://www.xbox.com/en-US/support/systemuse/xbox360/licensemigration/faq.htm

If you previously downloaded content from Xbox LIVE Marketplace, you must connect to Xbox LIVE to restore the licenses for that content on your specific Xbox 360 console, if you want to use the content when you are not connected to Xbox LIVE.

To restore your licenses, follow these steps:

1. Attach the hard drive or memory unit to your Xbox 360 console. This should be the hard drive or memory unit you originally downloaded the content to.

2. Turn on your Xbox 360 console.

3. Sign in to Xbox LIVE with the gamer profile that originally downloaded the content.

4. Go to Xbox Marketplace. Select Account Management, and then select Download History.

5. Select an item, and then select Download Again.

6. Repeat step 5 for each item in your download history.

After you have downloaded your content again, anyone will be able use that content on that Xbox 360 console, regardless of whether the person is signed in to Xbox LIVE or not.

Note: License restoration works only on the Xbox 360 console that has been returned to you.

You may also choose to call Xbox Phone Support for further assistance. For US and Canada customers, you may call Xbox Customer Service at 1-800-469-9269 at your earliest convenience, and we'll be happy to help you. We are open everyday from 6am to 10pm US Pacific Time.

For international customers, please contact Xbox Customer Service in your local region. (To find the correct Customer Service number for your region first use this link http://www.xbox.com/en-US/ChangeLocale.htm to select the appropriate country and then use the contact number found under the support menu). You may also call international assistance (direct dial to the US) by dialing 425-635-7180.

To expedite service, please provide Service Request Number *********** when you call.

Thank you for visiting Xbox.com. If you should have future questions on Xbox products or services, please be sure to revisit our Web site as we are continually adding information to enhance our service.

Best Regards,

Ashley

Microsoft XBOX Support Services

http://support.microsoft.com/

Thanks a million Ashley.

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Saw this on Digg. .... shudder

2008-11-15T15:46:00.001-06:00

What in the crispy cornbattered christ!?

Thanks, Digg, for taking a huge dumb in my brain every morning for the last 3 years.

How the hell am I going to kill enough brain cells to forget about that?

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Funny enough for you?

2008-11-15T08:58:00.001-06:00

Apparently, according to the fan, the quality of this blog has lessened. It seems the audience tunes in to Mental Fiber for humor and gross-out videos and the boys just haven't been scratching the itch lately. Subsequently I'd like to recommend this link for those who are no longer finding what they need in our pages. Perhaps, betwixt the copypasta and pedobear thumbs-up pics you'll find the banality you seek.

-Tad Whackly
CSO of The D.A.G.

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Phishing Scam Alert...

2008-11-12T09:48:00.004-06:00

I received this phishing scam today in my email wanting information about a Chase Bank Account. You can see in the email, that they've cleverly given a false URL link in the body of the email, with a different URL forward.

The thing that I don't understand about this is...if these scammers took the time to do this scam, why couldn't they have taken the extra step and made the false URL an HTTPS call instead of an HTTP call? Right away that is a dead give away, since nothing done in the banking world is ever done on an unsecure channel.

You can see that the URL forward goes to a website in Czech...stupid scammers! Be on alert if you receive any emails like the above in your inbox!!!

Alton Brown Was Wrong

2008-11-11T17:58:00.001-06:00

I just watched the cracker episode of Good Eats and I have to say that Alton was wrong. Dead wrong. He's been wrong before but I think, in this case, he was wrong in a way that could cause real and lasting problems for a few people under the right (or, in fact, wrong) circumstances.

Having a family member who experienced this directly and having recently researched false positives for my own reasons I can say with unshakeable conviction that, no matter what Alton Brown tells you, consuming poppy seeds can cause you to fail a drug test. In some people even small quantities are enough. Braniac, Food Detectives, Mythbusters, Snopes, and various others throughout news, entertainment, and internet media have confirmed it but that's just the popular culture evidence.

Scientific study has proven it is possible time and time again to the point where the cut-off level required for a positive result was actually raised to reduce the number of false positives in the drug testing industry. Even as the drug testing industry spokespeople were paying doctors to go on T.V. and claim it wasn't possible they were raising this limit due to the amount of money being lost in lawsuits brought by dismissed employees who had been sacked due to the results of the false positives.

The raised level has reduced the number of false positives but it wasn't really good enough. Here's why. Even with the change in the cut-off level it is still possible to test positive with nothing more than a bagel or some poppy seed bread or a handful of crackers. There are many variables such as differences in body chemistry, differences in poppy seeds (as an agricultural product they actually vary quite a bit), body weight, what the seeds were consumed with, how long ago they were consumed, how well they were chewed, and so on.

The other problem is that the raised cut-off level have also increased the number of false negatives. My personal opinion is that your job and your government should be the hell out of your personal life and you should be able to do whatever the fuck you want so long as you are safely sober when you're on the clock. However, opiate addicts, unlike users of other drugs I've discussed on this blog before, are much more likely to have a real problem and need real help. Skating by with a negative when you should have tested positive isn't really doing you any favors.

What is needed is a either a new test or a new approach to testing. I don't have all the answers and I can't say that I support any of the various active organizations working in this area. I may agree with most of their views but, in my mind, all of them will eventually cross a line that I'm uncomfortable with. For instance, I'm all for decriminalization but I can't support the legalization of all drugs. You don't have to run in to many crack, meth, or huffing addicts to realize that not everything should be legalized.

My suggestion to everyone is that you should all open your own mind. Go look at the info and make your own decision. Whatever you do don't believe everything you are told, no matter how trusted the source. Whether it's Alton Brown, the D.E.A., your naive-to-the-point-of-sillines mother-in-law, or me telling you what to think you're better off drawing your own conclusions; even if they are wrong. People who draw their own conclusions are more willing to change their mind if new information is presented. So, to me, even if you search out the info and decide I'm full of crap the fact that you got there on your own means there is a chance that, with logic and data, I can change your mind.

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Mezzo cut an album?

2008-11-11T01:33:00.001-06:00

On Friday somebody here will enter the realistic halfway point for average life expectancy. If the last half were the best half it probably wouldn't be so bad. Having worked your way out of diapers it's time to consider that you're actually on your way back into them. Not to mention the drooling and the being fed with a rubber coated spoon. Might as well get started now by pulling up your pants and watching the 6PM news.

Also... WTF

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It's not the Wigsphere...

2008-11-10T16:43:00.000-06:00

But it is the giftshop at The Simpsons ride at Universal Orlando. Too bad most of the stuff inside the store was mostly generic Simpson's merchandise. I was hoping to find more stuff inside that you could only get at Universal. We did make Homer and Bart flattened pennies though which was about as original as we were going to get.

Oh, no he f---ing didn't!

2008-11-09T16:24:00.003-06:00

Yes, I did.

A Star Wars Fans Dream...

2008-11-07T09:55:00.000-06:00

At Disney Hollywood Studios I went on the Star Tours Ride, which is billed as the ultimate thrill ride for the Star Wars fan. The ride was ok, but nothing earth shattering. It basically took us on a ride to endor through outerspace. It reminded me a lot of the flight to Mars ride that use to be in the Mars Restaurant at Woodfield Mall...nothing earth shattering. However, the full scale replica of an AT AT outside the entrance was enough to get me excited. Why do I have the feeling that I'm going to be able to personally relate to the characters in the Fanboys movie that is coming out soon?

As far as space rides go...if you are at Disney, take pictures outside of Star Tours, skip the ride, and head over to Epcot and ride the Mission Space Simulator over there. That one is way more realistic, and actually puts some G forces on your body as you launch towards Mars...

Parkour In Game

2008-11-06T09:55:00.002-06:00

Mirror's Edge

Have you seen the trailers and hype for this game? Early reviews are the best so far this year. There's a demo up on XBL this week. I think I'm going to go play it. If the game delivers on the promise of the trailers... I think I'm in love.

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Daylight, I Miss You

2008-11-05T11:41:00.001-06:00

With the recent time change here the sun is now setting so early that if I don't get an early start on the day I'm lucky if it still light when I'm done. Soon, in the depths of winter I will both start and end my work day in the dark. So I've been trying to get started a little earlier so I an enjoy the magic hour lighting for photography purposes rather than work during that time. Today I came home for lunch and to change socks (had a hole in the left one) and my damned cat has been so warm, snuggly, and happy to see me that I've been home an hour longer than I intended. Cats are evil.

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Decisive

2008-11-05T00:05:00.001-06:00

Can you feel the difference yet?

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Voter Intimidation

2008-11-04T11:38:00.001-06:00

Early reports of voter intimidation in St. Louis have surfaced. Unfortunately the evidence is a bit thin. I'm certain that, somewhere, in this election there will be real voter intimidation and I hope a few people crying wolf don't cause real issues to be ignored. Take some ID with you when you vote. Everywhere is different and accepts different forms of identification but no matter where you live you should be able to find out what kind of I.D. you need and you should be able to find something acceptable. Here in Ohio they will accept a utility bill, for Pete's sake. There's no reason to not have some form of I.D. on you

Apparently,

2008-11-03T11:21:00.001-06:00

I'm a big celebrity in Germany. At the Epcot park there was an exhibit put on by coca cola showcasing the different international flavors of their beverages around the world. Mezzo Mix was actually my favorite, and not because it was named after me!

Some of the more interesting flavors tastes like V8 juice. Yuck!!!!

This is from the hearings in Ohio. Nothing ever came of this. Imagine that.

2008-11-03T00:03:00.001-06:00

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Don't believe everything you're told. Don't even believe this. Go get your own info!

2008-11-03T00:00:00.001-06:00

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Them's Fightin' Words

2008-11-02T20:53:00.001-06:00

Just so you can be aware of the meaning when you hear this phrase on T.V. or the radio.

2008 in United States Of America

"The Obama Question"
1. Question his origin
2. Question his patriotism
3. Question whether he is an agent of socialism in disguise
4. ?

1843-1945 in Eastern Europe and Germany

"The Jewish Question" or "Judenfrage"
1. Question his origin
2. Question his patriotism
3. Question whether he is in agent of socialism in disguise
4. Implement the "Final Solution To The Jewish Question"

Whether the people who use the phrase realize its racist roots or not the people who coined it did and the fact that the phrase exist is no unfortunate coincidence.

Also, take into account the White Supremacist's "14 Words." It is a quote from founding member of "The Order" David Lane.

"We must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children."

If you remove the word "white" I'm pretty sure I've actually heard Palin say almost exactly this. I've been googling like mad to find it quoted or cited somewhere but I haven't had any luck. If anyone else heard it let me know.

Whether Palin or the RIght Wing talking heads are racists or not is irrelevant. Certain words arranged into particular patterns have histories and meanings beyond what was literally uttered. They should be condemned for not avoiding those phrases nearly as much as they should be condemned for using them on purpose. One option is willfull and mean and the other is neglectful and irresponsible.

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I need a Delorean

2008-11-02T07:06:00.001-06:00

Turns out that the Back to the Future ride no longer exists at Universal, as they closed of down last spring to make way for... The Simpsons ride.

The Simpsons ride was fun, and I think it used all the old ride hardware from the BTTF ride...they just changed the video and the ride controls. How ironic that the only way for me to experience the BTTF ride is to have a time machine!!!

China at Night

2008-11-01T08:32:00.001-05:00

The Epcot experience has been wonderful. The food and wine festival has been a great experience. So far, my favorite food has been the spaetzel in Germany, and the beef empanada's from Santiago Chile.

It is a great experience to be able to sample food and drink from all over the world all in one day. The crowds have been less than average, and with exception of the first day the weather has been very nice.

The downside, is that I have the stupid song from Figment's imagination land stuck on my head. It is almost as annoying as "It's a Small World".

Today we are off to Universal Studios as we are taking our hiatus from the land of Disney. I'm looking forward to going 88 miles per hour as 1.2¹gigawatts goes through the flux capacitor and sends me "Back to the Future"!!!!

WTF Do I Do For The Poor Kitty??????????

2008-10-31T19:03:00.001-05:00

Lao Tsu, the damned rat bastard, went and seriously fucked up his back paw. It didn't get stepped on or smushed or anything. As near as we can tell he either got a claw caught in something and it pulled out (which seems likely except the evidence doesn't support it) or he was doing that thing where cats bat at their claws trying to get that outer layer off... trimming them, I guess... and he got too rough with it and pulled it out. That seems likely since there was a small pool of blood on our bed and then the scattered bloody footprints throughout the house and no evidence of the kind of struggle or violence you'd expect if it had gotten caught in something. He seems relatively unbothered by it unless we try to clean it or inspect it. Still, that can't be good. It's the equivalent of pulling off your toenail right? It actually looks worse than that. We changed the cat litter right away and are planning to keep it super clean. We cleaned up all the blood from all over the damned house. I bought some pet wound care spray which must sting because he tried to run from it, shake it off, then attack it, and finally lick it off when we sprayed it on him the first time and he totally flipped out when we brought out the bottle the 2nd time. I dunno what to thin about it. It looks awful but it's scabbed up and he seems content. It's clean and isn't continuing to bleed. Should I just watch it for infections and keep it clean or should I take him to the vet? Vet = $$$ but I love the cat and the money is well worth it if I thought it'd ease his suffering... but he doesn't seem to be suffering. I just don't know.

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Boat Cruise to Downtown

2008-10-31T13:26:00.001-05:00

We took a boat to downtown Disney last night. It was a bit chilly, but was great fun. Today we are waiting for a Canadian tour video. Yah eh, look at dat der moose eh!!!

Redistribution Of Nougat

2008-10-29T23:57:00.000-05:00

Is it just me or is the new Snicker's wrapper vaguely... proletarian?

What type are you?

2008-10-28T19:27:00.001-05:00

I found this on wikipedia. Wouldn't it be fun to be a poo scientist?

Celebrity Morph by MyHeritage

2008-10-27T13:15:00.001-05:00

MyHeritage: Family trees - Genealogy - Celebs

Gold!

2008-10-24T14:39:00.003-05:00

Normally these kinds of videos are pretty stupid but this one is absolutely full of win. I mean, it's still super stupid but the massive funny at the end wasn't meant to be hilarious and that makes it awesome. Make sure you've got sound on.

Dad Scares Kids with Fake Knife Wound - Watch more free videos

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F-ing Barf

2008-10-24T12:24:00.000-05:00

Beggars Night

2008-10-23T09:53:00.003-05:00

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Beggars Night or more properly Beggars' Night, is a regional term for what is referred to in most parts of the United States as "Trick or Treat." Specifically, the term is broadly but not exclusively used throughout Ohio, in many parts of Iowa, and in some cities in Massachusetts.

In general, Beggars Night represents the "treat" portion of Trick or Treat, where children in costume make evening rounds of homes (and to a lesser extent to businesses during the day) and are given candy. This being closely tied to, but distinct from Halloween, when various forms of mischief may occur.

The night has usually been scheduled by municipal governments on a date prior to the actual Halloween date of October 31. In recent years however, the trend has been towards having it on Halloween, and the use of the term has been slightly diminished because of the loss of the distinction from the date of Halloween.

*My kid can't trick or treat on Halloween, which is a FRIDAY NIGHT, because some uppity paranoid cracker decided to lobby for Beggar's night on the 30th. Subsequently I am also missing the Beastie Boys concert in town.

So here, I believe, is the reasoning. Some kids did something dangerous and mean on Halloween and everyone panicked thinking we were headed to some sort of orgy of arson like Detroit and so they created Beggar's night so that the kids could be out and trick or treating on a night that isn't halloween, when the the bad people would be less likely to strike since they are obviously fuelled by Satan and can therefore only reach their full mischief potential on 10.31, and that way the cops can whip around on Halloween and detain/harass/imprison anyone that looks under 25 or wears a costume because if they were a legitimate trick or treater they would have been out the night before... on Beggar's night. Is that right?

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Am I Rain Man?

2008-10-21T11:33:00.003-05:00

Judge Wapner's on...gotta watch Wapner. OK, so maybe I'm not Rain Man, but my prowess on Lumines Live makes me feel sort of Rain Man-ish. Last night I sat down to play a little Lumines, and I decided to play the Tokyo club Mix mode. Mind you I wasn't thinking about anything, just sort of playing the game like I always do. When I finished the game, I curiously checked the weekly leaderboard, and lo and behold, where do I stand? # 1 on the top of the weekly leaderboard!

Whackly and I have always joked that I have a talent for that game on par with Rain Man...imagine if I actually played to be "good" at that game...I could be the next King of Kong...but on Lumines! Well, I don't think that is going to happen...

I'm sure my first place on the leaderboard will be surpassed this week, in fact as of this writing it probably has been already. But it is nice to know that for one small moment I was on top of the Lumines Mountain looking down at all others!

Xbox Live Update 11.19.08

2008-10-19T15:45:00.001-05:00

New Xbox dashboard and live update on November 19th.

It's going to have all kinds of new and original* features.
It's going to to use spuring bearings to make 33% less heat generated in every seventh slot of the stater.
It will serve as a gift for the 3rd anniversary of the glorious day I first goy my 360. Probably the end to my ability to make warranty claims. *sigh* This refurb replacement had better hold!
Most importantly... Direct to the community ameteur/indie games for free and cheap. Time to get ahold of the XNA tools, Mezzo. I feel creativity coming on.

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Cincinnatti Time Waste

2008-10-18T13:19:00.002-05:00

The George Costanza Candy Identification Quiz

Score: 90% (9 out of 10)

Beer Tasting????

2008-10-13T23:05:00.001-05:00

Michelle and I went to an IFT event tonight. It is a group dedicated to food technologists. The keynote speakers were from a company that births new products from inception to delivery. Tonight's topic....beer!!!!

It was rough. We had to go eat a nice German dinner of schnitzel, sausage, and spaetzel. (Whackly exclaims....pbbbbbbtt), and afterwards we got to sample a whole gamut of new beers that have just reached the market.

My favorite as the IPA, an my least favorite was the clamato bud light. Although the stuff that tasted like cough syrup was a Close second. My other observation was that the pumpkin beer wasn't pumpkin-y enough.

Aside from having to parallel park at the restaurant Austin powers style, and the surly wait staff, it was a good time. Beer and german food. You gotta love Octoberfest!!!

Oh For Fuck's Sake

2008-10-07T00:28:00.003-05:00

Recently someone I know mentioned they had missed meeting a friend and were told by another friend that the first friend likely had failed to show up because she had become hooked on marijuana and had run out. I made a mild polite protest but inside my guts were screaming "BULLSHIT BULLSHIT BULLSHIT". All over this country and, indeed, the world people are being fed misinformation about marijuana and they believe it because it comes from sources they are programmed to trust... like the government... who (and this is noteable fact... go check it out) outlawed marijuana as a move against mexican immigrants in the early 20th century.

Here's a little truth (with citations of published studies) about marijuana.
Here's an article from earlier this year concerning some of the reasons the press and government have a vested interest in a continued prohibition (slightly less full of citations but still full of researchable claims).
Here's a history of how it became illegal. This story appears on an pro-legalization propaganda site but despite that it's actually true. There a show that runs semi-regularly on the History Channel and a similar show you might catch here and there on PBS that outlines this same story. It's all true.

In conclusion, you can believe whatever you want about marijuana. You succumb to the product of the racism, jingoism, and yellow journalism of 100 years ago. You could, and I recommend this path, take a few moments to consider that not everything you are told by the government and the media is true. This girl may have a douche bag loser boyfriend who sits around smoking pot all day. She might have the self esteem of a sexually confused frat boy's jerk sock. She might be trying to regulate depression or any number of treatable mental illnesses with marijuana, or maybe she's just plain stupid. No matter how you look at it, though, it's extremely unlikely that she was dragged down by an addiction to marijuana. You don't have to smoke it. Until it's legalized smoking pot is a risky behavior whether you agree or disagree with the information in the links above. On the other hand, don't look down on people who don't believe as you do. You would have to at least square, possibly cube, the number of people with an actual problem with marijuana to come up with the number of people with alcohol problems. Go look down at them. They're actually a danger to you. Hearst and Pulitzer never told you that did they?

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My apoligies if you are offended... but...

2008-10-06T20:19:00.003-05:00

I hereby pledge to respond with bile and venom to any email forward I get that isn't of some legitimate purpose (like travel arrangements, necessary informational updates, or shared congratulations). I pledge to do so no matter who sends it to me so I hope to god I never get one from my mom. If you have my email address just because you know me and don't send me email for any other reason why the hell do you think I give a shit about your "answer all these questions with the first letter of your name" email? I really fucking don't. I moved hundreds of miles away and have maintained friendships with 5 people in the whole state and you aren't one of them. I don't have any personal problem with you. I don't dislike you but please understand...

every time I get excited because I think I got and email from my cousin and I click on it and it turns out to be another inane pile of tripe I want to tattoo your name on a puppy and strangle it.

Puccini's Smiling Teeth Pizza...

2008-10-05T23:24:00.001-05:00

This was the neon sign outside the pizza place that whackly and I got a pie from in Indianapolis. The pizza was good. Mission accomplished on finding a local pizza place, not a chain.

Someday We'll Go All The Way

2008-10-01T11:01:00.003-05:00

In honor of the Cubs making a post season run for the second year in a row, here's Eddie Vedder's tribute song about the Cubbies. This year is the year!

It's Fall...

2008-09-30T09:53:00.001-05:00

And with that comes pumpkin farms, and corn mazes. Last weekend I went to this pumpkin farm in Wisconsin to meet my brother's family for the afternoon. The highlight of the day was a jaunt into this maze. The corn was 10 feet tall, and the maze was pretty complex.

They had a vantage point in the middle of the maze where you could get above the corn. It's amazing to see the complexities of the designs used in the mazes. I suppose they use computers and GPS to map out the designs. Halloween is just around the corner (at which time I will be on vacation!)

My reaction to existing in the Bible belt.

2008-09-29T17:42:00.002-05:00

http://www.talkorigins.org/

Believe whatever you want but educate yourself and keep your crap out the schools. If you want your kid to learn voodoo and daedra blood worship that's fine with me but teach it at home and keep it out of institutions of learning where standards and scientific principles still mean something.

I keep getting surprised and blindsided by this stuff. It seems to happen most often in situations where it would be inappropriate for me to jump up and say "I can refute that statement and all the rhetoric that follows it with logic and the lightest dusting of critical thought."

I know there are some of you who don't agree with my views on this matter and that's cool. It's not my job or my place to say there's no God or that God didn't have a hand in how the world was formed. I'm fine with that. On the other hand, sometimes people just step right out on the end of the plank and dare you to dunk them and you can't and that is frustrating.

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I'm out. Done.

2008-09-28T21:37:00.001-05:00

Some asshole... and it's increasingly likely some self described Christian asshole found himself inspired, this weekend, to spray some manner of chemical irritant into the room at a local Dayton Mosque where the children and babies wait while their parents are praying. Apparently they've decided that all believers in Islam are terrorists and decided to become terrorists themselves in order to combat them. This wretched, scum sucking, waste of sperm... this unfit for use as an organ donor, maggot infested pustule on the taint of the town I call home decided to attack children. I don't want him killed. I want him burned... covered in oil and lit on fire. Keep him alive, certainly. I don't believe in capital punishment. On the other hand, for a fucker that attacks children there's no reason he can't be left with just the minimum equipment needed to stay alive and then locked in a pitch dark room and left to gurgle his regrets until his biological machinery wears out. Maybe they could leave him some unscarred skin on his back so he can feel his cold metal table, and maybe they could leave him one working eye so he could see the searing light come on when the nurse comes to replace his IV and empty his colostomy bag. He certainly doesn't need arms or legs. He only needs one kidney and one lung. Hell... who needs a body. He can be a wad of organs in a plastic sack. As long as he's still alive it's not violating any of my principles.

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Pandemic, I miss you.

2008-09-28T18:25:00.001-05:00

I bought Force Unleashed. I got home and watched the G4 review before playing it. I had to read other reviews to confirm what I saw. I returned Force Unleashed unopened. I'm a huge Star Wars fan but gone are the days where merely being about Star Wars is enough to interest me in a product. Lucas, If it's crap I don't want it...

...even if it's Star Wars crap.

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When you wish...

2008-09-24T23:15:00.001-05:00

I went to Disneyworld last fall with my family. I enjoyed it so much that I have decided to go back again this fall. Last year it was with little kids in tow (my niece and nephew), but this year it is all grown ups. It should be a lot of fun.

One of the reasons for going back in the fall is for the food and wine festival which is run every fall at Epcot. Foods, wines, and beers from all over the world.

So I officially put the vacation time off in my work calendar, which makes it official, although I paid for the vacation package weeks ago. Just when it is getting cold up here, I will be heading for an extended summer. I can't wait!

Gas Shortages Being Obfuscated?

2008-09-22T21:51:00.002-05:00

Granted, I'm not exactly the most ravenous news consumer but between Digg, Delicious, Reddit, Google News, The BBC World Service, and NPR I feel like I pretty much get a whiff of everything that's going on. Still, I had no idea that only the state of Kentucky separated me (on Southern Ohio) from major gas shortages and an ever increasing riotous freakout. Nashville, Atlanta, and many other cities in the Southeast are experiencing a gasoline shortage that's quickly reaching serious and likely extremely problematic proportions. Has the press completely missed this or was I having a mini-stroke when it was being talked about? A casual mention from the Roaming Gnome is the only reason I'm even aware that this is happening. Is the press keeping quiet to prevent a national panic? Is that their job? Shouldn't there be a national panic? Wouldn't that inspire some change? Who would have the kind of influence it would take to keep it under wraps and also want to keep this quiet? Well... the Bush administration...

...

...

...

Am I crazy? Let me go get my tinfoil hat...

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Mehaffie's Pies

2008-09-21T17:08:00.001-05:00

For the 2 of you readers that live in the Dayton area, have you been to Mehaffie's? You've probably seen it (Smithville and Linden just south of 35.) $7.50 per pie! Not the best pie I've ever had. I had two baker grandmas after all. It is, however, the best pie I ever had for $7.50 by a wide margin.

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Youtube. Teacher. Mother. Secret Lover.

2008-09-18T17:13:00.002-05:00

If you don't find this cute or hilarious you are dead inside.

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Why oh why?

2008-09-18T11:52:00.001-05:00

When I update shozu on my iPhone, does it always break my set up for blogger so that I have to re add it? Frustrating to say the least. Migration of new versions are supposed to be painless!!!!

Still Alive

2008-09-18T10:41:00.003-05:00

Zombie need sleep. Fuck brains. Zombie no need brains. Brains only distract for tedious work and sleeping. Zombie lack ability create. Zombie sentence structure need work. Zombie refers to himself in 3rd person. Zombie dead sexy.

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Ike got depressed and then tried to kill me.

2008-09-15T02:35:00.003-05:00

Long after Ike had been downgraded to a "tropical depression" it decided to shimmy its way up the midwest and fuck a bunch of people who didn't deserve it. The bulk of it passed right over Indianapolis, Chicago, Milwaukee, and Western Michigan. People in those areas got a lot of rain and a hell of a thunderstrom, I think, but I don't know that they got anything like what we got here in Southwestern Ohio. Nearly (or maybe over) a million people in SW Ohio are without power after nearly 16 hours of sustained winds, which reached tornado proportions (without the tornado), and took off with anything not nailed down. Trees and parts of trees are everywhere. Telephone poles, street lamps, and billboards everywhere are just blown over. Nothing hit them. They just blew away. I've seen a few roofless buildings (including the main building where our storage warehouse is located), a few tipped over cars/trucks, a tipped over boat still strapped to its trailer, a few stoplights blown hundreds of feet clear of the intersections they once governed, a crap load of accidents caused by stupid people who don't realize you are supposed to stop at intersections where the traffic lights aren't working, and my boss saw a Cesna upside down on the ground in Springboro. Throughout it all I've noticed one consistent thing that is irksome but also hilarious. Apparently people from Ohio don't think high winds are dangerous unless there's an actual tornado warning. They will happily stand outside with their hands shielding their eyes to gawk and wonder at the carnage as tree branches as big as my van threaten to pass me on the highway and roofing shingles whip around their scalps like pissed off Apache. Apparently, as long as the sky is blue and the sun is shining they don't think the flying cows and flailing power lines are signs that they should get their hayseed asses to shelter.

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Ike Hunt Hear You

2008-09-12T16:43:00.001-05:00

According to the weather.com 10 day forcast the weather over the weekend will be rainy but mild. I'm on call so that seems good to me. However, the ever changing 3 day path projection of Ike seems to disagree with weather.com. Color me concerned.

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Storms

2008-09-08T22:46:00.001-05:00

I like storms. I like them a lot... when I'm not on call. I stuck, right now, in an eddy of indecision. If I go to bed I'll get called out immediately but if I stay up and wait for the call it won't come. Stupid ironic job...

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I've been cheating....

2008-09-05T18:16:00.002-05:00

I have another blog. One where I do nothing but post photographs. I've mentioned it here before and am mentioning it here again because nobody ever goes there or comments on any of the posts.

I post there often. More often than here, in fact, and each photo has a comment explaining it or remarking upon it. Also, at the bottom of my other blog, you can listen to my 8tracks mixtape and chat with me via Digsby. Everytime I update the blog or the mix tape it's announced on my twitter feed.

It's a real tornado of awesome and you're totally missing out.

M.F. JR.

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Apples and String Theory

2008-09-04T22:39:00.002-05:00

I'm going to hit two completely different subjects.

First, Sarah Palin. I don't buy that her son Trig is actually her daughter's and I don't really think it matters since her 17 year old daughter is pregnant anyhow. I've seen predictions the daughter will have an "accidental miscarriage." What trash. Some people like to assume the worst about people. I think Sarah Palin is genuine in her belief in pro-life. I don't think that makes her less scary but regarding abortion there's little evidence she's a hypocrite. However, her 17 year old pregnant daughter does kind of take a crap on the whole "abstinence only" sex education bullshit that she supports. Obviously, here daughter's pregnancy doesn't prove that abstinence only education doesn't work because it's an isolated anecdotal case and can't be logically used to win the argument. However, since we all know that abstinence only education is ineffective and nothing more than an attempt by self appointed morality police to bring back an innocent past that never actually existed in order to make people easier to control we can take the opportunity to lean back, point a finger, and say "Ha-ha!" Also, If anybody needs something to do, go back through the soundbites from Republican talking heads from back when Mrs. Clinton was still in the race and drag up every instance in which they attacked her by saying that she was just an ambitious harpe bitch who'd do anything to get ahead, or similar. All those comments should be shoved back in their faces because Palin makes Clinton look like Princess fucking Toadstool or the love child of Anne Frank and Mohandis Ghandi (I know that's messed up but Ghandi liked them young... I didn't make him a pervert). Seriously. If you were a republican who disliked Clinton for being a power hungry bitch then Sarah Palin should scare the living hell out of you. I didn't know anything about Palin until she was named in the neo-con veepstakes. Since then I've done some reading, trying to keep an open mind of course, through pro and con articles including many statements from people who know her personally (including more than one person who said something like "I'm only willing to speak up because she can't touch me. Everyone else is afraid to say anything because they're afraid she'll come after them in some way or another.") My conclusion is that there are only two people ff the top of my mind that could have been a worse choice. Michelle Bachman and Heinrich Himmler's closest living ancestor. It's possible, though, that my assumption that Heinrich Himmler's heir is as evil as old Heinrich himself is possibly faulty. Perhaps Himler's heir would have been better.

2nd I've come into possession of a file. It claims to be a 1080p version of Episode IV. I've watched it and compared it side by side with the DVD. It's definately not an upscaled dvd. It's much better than that. I don't know that it's full 1080p but I could believe that it's 1080p that's been upscaled from 720p. Every once in a while, though, I catch some detail that almost convinces me that it really is a full 1080p version. I wish I was enough of an expert to know how to find out. What I'm really confused about, though, is the origin of this file. The movies have not been released on HDDVD or BluRay. What was the source for this file? Anybody have any ideas? No, I will not share it or give you a copy. I will not say where I got it. I'm trying not to get in trouble with the MPAA (though, it'd be bad form for them to come after me over this since I have like every version ever released of the movies from VHS on up (I even had episode 1 on VHS!) and it's not like I wouldn't rush at breakneck speed to buy it on BluRay if I could. I'd buy a PS3 to watch it on, if I had to. My loyalty to Star Wars outshines my distaste for Sony. That's saying something.

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Team Fortress 2: Bureaucrats invade everything.

2008-09-03T18:25:00.002-05:00

Valve's Doug Lombardi stated that they were working on getting the additional content out to console users and that there would be an announcement soon. That was 5.21.08, already over 6 months after the release of The Orange box. It was rumored that Valve didn't want to charge for the content and Microsoft wasn't having it. On August 22nd Lombardi told Kotaku (I haven't read the Kotaku article, only other things that referenced it) that the content was, indeed, coming to consoles and that there would be announcements soon. Wait.. that's the same thing he said before. There was one new thing. Valve lost and Microsoft will be charging for the content via Xbox Live and, supposedly, the content will hit before the end of the year. Great... new downloadable content for a great game that was released nearly a year ago (way over a year by the time the new content is released). I blame Valve. If you're going to string us all along, Valve, you should at least stick to your guns. If you'd have given in to Microsoft right away I could have paid for and been playing the new content months ago. Does anybody other than me even care? They've all moved on to other games. People who really loved TF2 that much probably bought it on P.C. and have been playing the new content for month after month... ...for free. The xbox live games get fewer and fewer and the likelihood that I'll get anybody on my friends list to actually play the game with me get's less and less likely. TF2 was the most fun I've had with a multiplayer game since Star Wars Battlefront and yet I might skip the downloadable content. I'll have Fable by then... and even if I don't I'll be the only one left who's interested in playing and I don't want to play a multiplayer game by myself. I don't want to play it will the other 3 strangers that are still playing on Xbox Live either. They are probably all unattented pre-teens and tweens who will spent the whole game making fart sounds into the mic, or yelling "Nigger" and "Faggot" like their overstimulated and underparented asses haven't overused the words so much in their lame little online rebellions that they've become meaningless. Don't you have to be at least 13? Don't these parents watch these kids? What parent thinks it's OK for their kids to play TF2 or GoW online? Do they know what these ESRB ratings indicate? Do they care? All parents... do me a favor. Sneak up on your kid playing online and listen to what he's saying into his microphone. Then break all his fingers so he'll never play again. He'll end up in foster care, unable to annoy me by yelling "Fuck!" every 2 seconds on Xbox Live and you'll be in jail where you belong for not parenting your kid.

P.S. Inappropriate anger my ass!

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DIY Web Comic: Add your own stick figures!

2008-09-02T20:45:00.006-05:00

Yahoo The Zapper
9:19 PM chase scene
9:20 PM and it's daytime
9:20 PM noon
9:20 PM then they round a corner
9:20 PM and it's like nightvision past 11PM dark ouside
9:20 PM in the span of 45 seconds with no explanation

Yahoo MadHobbit
9:21 PM oh yeah - you told me about that
9:26 PM so other than poor editing?

Yahoo The Zapper
9:27 PM story thin
9:28 PM why do we always assume that some dork who is out of the girl's league can suddenly involve her in something dangerous and now they'll be in love forever and share a strong romantic bond?
9:29 PM and why does anybody give a shit in a movie about FIGHTING ROBOTS!
9:30 PM i want a movie about fighting robots that's robots fighting from beginning to end and the only hint a love story is every 20 minutes when the fight builds to a climax involving nuclear weapons the corresponding calm is filled by topless women pillow fighting on roller skates for 2 minutes before the fighting starts again
9:30 PM now THAT's a movie
9:31 PM speaking of which i saw babylon A.D.
9:32 PM not so bad.. except the ending failed to sew up any of the loose ends or actually fully expose the plot.. which sucked
9:32 PM because there was no sequel pontential either
9:33 PM so in the end it was like a dumbed down action movie version of children of men... which, although a far superior movie, was not nearly as fun and not coincedentally has far fewer hot blondes with french accents

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LEGO, please explain this....

2008-08-30T02:08:00.004-05:00

This little guy showed up in my list of characters in a freeplay session. I don't even recall him being in the grid of characters you've been assigned right before the level starts. I don't think I unlocked anything or did anything to make him suddenly appear. I just went to switch to a different kind of character and there he was. WTF is that thing?!

Meat Sweats

2008-08-30T02:05:00.002-05:00

These are pork shoulders smoked overnight. I was on the couch anyhow because the coughing was coming back and I would have kept everyone up with that. What better for a cough than getting up every 45 minutes to check on your BBQ? At 14 hours on the smoke I got fed up and finished them in the oven. I pulled them at 195 and put them on the stove top under foil. This was taken 10 minutes later when the temp was still 190! They took forever to cool and were delicious. There's much left in the fridge and freezer. No rub was used and they were injected with a concoction of my own that included honey and Daddies (the strong brown sauce) and the liquid that came off of them while in the oven was a disturbing red color because of it.
The 2nd photo is 3 "fatties" on the smoker with the tiny fire burning on the bricks in the corner. We had made sausage and found that the kitchenaid is an excellent grider but a rubbish sausage stuffer. We gave up on stuffing and put all the bulk sausage in gladware containers. Then I figured that I would take a few out and let them thaw and then roll them into fatties. Then I decided I didn't need to roll them and just chucked them on the BBQ. The two on the bottom are small size bulk breakfast sausage (homemade extra black pepper and sage recipe) and the one on top was a large size gladware container full of bulk bratwurst (seasoning purchased from Buther & Packer and unaltered except the liberties I took with the liquid that went into the sausage... why use water?). All were delicious. The leftovers have made their way onto fried smoked-bratwurst-loaf sandwiches and the smoked breakfast sausage is ridiculously good when chopped up and tossed in some macaroni and cheese. Tomorrow I'll be at it again. I'll be smoking another giant bratwurst loaf in addition to a traditional homemade fatty as well as another bratwurst loaf in the shape of an additional fatty. The traditional homemade fatty is getting a rub first. Salt, brown sugar, smoked paprika, and black pepper. Sound good? It does to me. I'll be going down the hickory chunk road again although I did locate the gladware tub of pistachio shells, too. I don't know if I'll use them or not. I can't find anything concrete about whether or not it's a good idea. I wonder how long I could keep writing about BBQ? Hey! Anyone got any side dishes I can cook on the BBQ that don't involve corn on the cob, meat, OR wrapping something in foil to where I could just do it in the oven and it would taste exactly the same?

So...

2008-08-26T20:59:00.001-05:00

Labor day is here already. It signals the end of summer. It is hard to believe that it is over already. I'm already bracing myself for winter's pending doom.

This weekend I'm headed back to Whackly's old haunts as I'm headed to Minnesota for the weekend. Guess I'll check out the Minnesota state fair...maybe have myself some baconated chocolate. Mmmmm

8tracks.com/whackly

2008-08-26T09:55:00.001-05:00

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Sorry Mixwit. 8tracks.com is more like what I lost.

2008-08-19T22:38:00.001-05:00

RIP Muxtape

Back in business, y'all. Still hoping for the return of Muxtape but this'll do just fine.

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Lego My Eggo

2008-08-19T10:36:00.001-05:00

The new Lego Discovery Store at the Streets of Woodfield in Schaumburg has a gigantic giraffe outside made of Legos...How cool is that? I want to take my Niece and Nephew there the next time they are at my place. Then I'll have an excuse to pay money to go play with a ton of Legos!!!!

Replacement?

2008-08-18T19:52:00.001-05:00

www.mixwit.com/whackly

It's not the same. There were a lot of songs and artists I wanted to include but couldn't find. On the other hand I did find some cools stuff I don't have in my collection like the MC Chris/Gorillaz mashup. I'm calling it a maybe. What do you think?

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Muxtape Nuxxed

2008-08-18T18:45:00.001-05:00

One week after I discovered the site... One week after stumbling across the perfect venue through which to share my passion... One week after getting as close to achieving true enlightenment as I will ever get... It's gone. Right now www.muxtape.com has this simple phrase posted on the homepage:

"Muxtape will be unavailable for a brief period while we sort out a problem with the RIAA."

The giant fork is out and given what muxtape was I'm pretty sure it's done.

There are other sites like 8tracks and mixwit that allow you to do much the same thing but in those cases you don't upload your own songs. You find the songs in their lists. I might give Mixwit a try since a brief search did actually turn up some fairly obscure artists but I just know I'll lose interest as soon as I can find a song in my own music folder that they don't have in their library.

So sad. Please, even though it's almost certain that the end has come and my brief and wildly passionate relationship with muxtape.com is over, pray for muxtape. Maybe, just maybe, this is the instance where the RIAA will realize that killing muxtape will actually stop people from discovering new music and actually cost them money rather than reduce piracy. You can't download the music off muxtape anyway (at least not without the sort of knowhow that automatically means you could get the music easier and at a better sound quality via bittorrent, irc, or usenet). Pray for muxtape. I'll be at Amazon.com cancelling every CD order from an artist I found on muxtape.com over the last week (Goodbye Ratatat, Lullatone, Burial, and Loscil. You are good bands and I was excited to own your discs but you understand, don't you? It's the principle of the thing....). Suck on that one, RIAA.

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I can't make the rant...

2008-08-16T18:48:00.001-05:00

So, from time to time I will completely spaz on this forum or that forum or in the comments of this site or the other. Typically I will invest more emotion in a subject than it really warrants. Here is one such rant I dropped on Digg.com to little or no acclaim in response to a lament about lack of "hardcore" games for the Wii.

"I think that's because "hardcore" is a convoluted and meaningless term. Games should be challenging, fun, and hopefully fresh/innovative. Apparently all a game needs to be hardcore is some headshots, blood, tits, a fuck here and a shit there and BAM... HARDCORE. Battallion Wars 2 is a seriously kickass game. No blood though so it's obviously not hardcore. Meanwhile, yet another dead simple FPS that's the same as everything before it is cock slappingly hardcore and sends low IQ adults and underdeveloped teens into paroxysms of uterine style hysterics. Everytime I see the phrase "Hardcore gamers" my mind instantly replaces it with "Gamers who are fascinated by explosions and aren't very good at spelling." Fuck the hardcore mold. If you people want to play games to pleasure the same part of your brain that tingles when you touch your penis then buy an xbox 360 or a ps3 and shut up about the wii. If you want to play good games regardless of whether they are bloody or controversial then a wii is a good addition to your arsenal."

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Is that a snake in your pocket?

2008-08-12T23:29:00.001-05:00

30 foot anaconda staring out of the water. Glad there was glass between me and him!

A new hobby project (soon to be abandoned along with the others)

2008-08-12T19:45:00.002-05:00

http://whackly.muxtape.com

I'm going to try to change one song each day. Maybe more if I get ambitious.

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"We will return triumphant to the blog space!!!!" -EzMezzo

2008-08-11T18:42:00.001-05:00

Can you have a comeback if nobody ever gave a shit in the first place?

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Kids are idiots! You can all get di-icked 'cause I've got condoms.

2008-08-10T19:13:00.002-05:00

Can somebody get this kid's parents an award?

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No..... no....... not me...... NOT TO ME!!!!!!!!!!

2008-08-09T20:45:00.001-05:00

The unthinkable has happened. The horribly unspeakably unthinkable.

Red

Ring

Of

Death

This isn't happening....

This ISN"T HAPPENING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Surface tension?

2008-08-09T18:25:00.001-05:00

Is it some property of surface tension that causes the mirror effect when you're underwater looking looking up at the surface (i.e, below).

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That sure would taste good with butter...

2008-08-09T16:39:00.001-05:00

Spider crab at the Shedd Aquarium.

Dear Computer browser(s)...

2008-08-08T08:28:00.006-05:00

We've had a long relationship, in fact when I first met you you were just a grad student project from a couple of guys at the University of Illinois, I think they started a little company called Netscape. But I've found another, sexier one to take my attention. I never meant to replace you, and I swore that l never meant to this to happen, but there is another. Safari browser mobile...I didn't think it could happen, but it has captivated me like no other.

It's not that she is better than you, in fact she has some major deficiencies because she's a mobile browser. But... She does have one major advantage, she's always there for me. When I was at a Thai restaurant and wanted to know the origins of baby corn, you were not there. When I was at the grocery store and needed an ingredient list for hot German potato salad, you were not there. When I was sitting through tornado like conditions in a parking garage the other day, you were not there to help me check radar. Guess what, Safari was.

Ever since Safari came into my life, I've found less and less excuses to boot up a computer and use you. I never thought I would be happy with a mobile web experience, but my thoughts have changed. Safari mobile has made me rethink everything I thought about mobile browsing. Now that I'm hooked, there's no turning back.

P.S. Since whackly had such a genius post about flock, I thought I would do one of my own. Thanks for the idea. This is a tribute to your creative blogging style. Humorous AND informative.

Flock Opera. Flock it right in the ear.

2008-08-07T22:37:00.001-05:00

Opera,

We were once in the deepest love. I thought it would never end and I felt like you did too. But... I've been cheating on you... with Flock. I know she's not as pretty and I know she's Firefox's sister and we all know you've got a huge inferiority complex about Firefox. I was going to give you the "It's not you, It's me." speech but it's just not true. It's not me. It's you. You are better than Firefox. You are faster and more useable. You are prettier. You... well... you're still great... but... Flock is better. You just don't understand. Flock is like all the compatibility and ease of Firefox and all of your coolness together in one package. I know you can do all the things that Flock can do but damnit... too many floaty and "always in the way" widgets detracts from the sleek and streamlined experience that attracted me to you in the first place. It's not that you're bad. It's not that you're not good enough. It's not that you aren't better than IE and Firefox. It's that... well... Flock is sexier. There, I said it. You did everything I could have ever asked a browser to do and did it flawlessly. But flock does all of those things within a micron of just as well as you AND Flock fucks my brains out too. Hell... Flock probably goes A2M. You see what I'm saying, Opera? You've been replaced! Take your widgets and EUDouche programmers and go.

-Whackly

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Un-Banned

2008-08-06T12:49:00.002-05:00

Digg un-banned me. There was a post from the Chicago Tribune about the Cirque du Soleil contortionists and one of the threads consisted of some fairly lude comments about the girls in the story. Another Digg user made a comment that the girl on the left that these pervs were drooling over was only 11 and he was being dugg down for saying so. I made a sarcastic comment on behalf of the gentleman who was pointing out that the girl was 11 years old but when somebody alerted the Digg moderators that a bunch of sick fucks were making sick ass comments about an 11 year old girl the whole thread was removed and everyone in the thread was banned. It didn't matter, I guess, that I was one of the people saying "Dude! She's 11 years old. You guys are sick-ass." Dumb. Oh well. When they told me why I was banned and I called bullshit they un-banned me. No harm, no foul.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Banned!

2008-08-05T20:23:00.001-05:00

I've been banned from Digg.com. I can't imagine why. I didn't post links to anything illegal or say anything generally forbidden. I didn't post the HDDVD crack key in a comment or anything. Still... digg.com/users/whackly is gone. I emailed support hoping to at least find out why. Fuck a duck.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Japanese garden at the Chicago Botanic Gardens

2008-08-04T15:31:00.001-05:00

For RTJumper

2008-08-03T10:59:00.002-05:00

http://www.thislife.org/Radio_Episode.aspx?sched=1249

Act One. Choosers Not Beggars.

You'll know the part that made me think of you when you hear it.

Blogged with the Flock Browser

Testing Flock

2008-08-02T23:39:00.001-05:00

I am composing this post in flock. I must admit that I am very impressed so far. I would say I am as impressed with flock as I was the first time I tried opera. In fact, if the experience is this good ongoing over the next few days I may be saying goodbye to opera. :(

Blogged with the Flock Browser

I Hope Clone Wars...

2008-07-22T23:37:00.003-05:00

is cool. I saw the trailer for it again at the movie theater tonight. It seems like it will fit the bill, although I'm a bit upset that not all of the original actors lent their voices to this project. I guess from the clone wars television shorts, maybe there is voice acting continuity from that, so who knows? The trailer does do enough to get me excited about the release though. For the love of god, no more jar jar binks!!!

Testing the iPhone...

2008-07-19T08:19:00.002-05:00

Ok, I realize that I have become a lemming, as I purchased the new iPhone this week as soon as I could get my hands on one. It is my first introduction to the world of smart phones, and can I say, that I have been pleasantly surprised. Taking whackly's advice, I have refused to hook up my work email to the phone. Smart move!!!

Now that I can blog on the go, maybe I can be better at posting to this blog. Good intentions at least part of the way there right?

I'm tired of paying for hobby software...

2008-07-19T00:20:00.002-05:00

...and I'm downright sick of pirating it.

I'm thinking of taking my little music production hobby open source with Audacity, Traverso, and others.

Good move?

Advice?

I realize that the readership for this blog has tanked since none of Mezzo's friends know about it and none of my friends have seen me in over a year, use the internet that much, and/or care. Still... at least 1 f-ing comment a week would be ok.

Need Music

2008-07-17T18:15:00.003-05:00

My favorite bands haven't released anything new for while. A few of the projects that I was looking forward to have stalled or fallen apart completely. I need new music. All the best stuff I've discovered recently is already a couple of years old. I can't bear to listen to pop radio. I don't really watch T.V. I used to watch the shows like subterranean on the music stations but both the videos and the bands began to wear on me after while. There a few bands that I really liked until I saw them taking themselves way too seriously on T.V. and realized what douchey emo dicks they are. Somebody help me out. Tell me about some music I don't know about already.

An Explosion Of Color or Vomiting Cheaply

2008-07-14T14:45:00.001-05:00

I'm not sure which of the two titles is better but it's irrelevant. For those of you who are interested I just posted a bunch of pictures from this year's July 4th fireworks around the area over at M.F. JR. Have a look.

Questions nobody asked me.

2008-07-02T15:19:00.003-05:00

Also included:
Answers.

Bonus:
Follow up questions nobody cares about.

1. Did WALL-E borrow from other sci-fi?
A1. Yes.
2. Does it impact the credibility of WALL-E?
A2. No.
3. Why?
A3. Anyone creating sci-fi borrows from other sci-fi material or even non-sci-fi material. Often they are creating new worlds, universes, and scenarios that would be boring if you had to explain every detail. Some themes are just an accepted part of sci-fi and offer familiarity to the reader/watcher without having to tack on a 27,000 word prologue. Often times the sci-fi creator is unaware that they are even borrowing an idea. The idea is just that universal or just that good.
4. Can you give an example from WALL-E?
A4. Yes. After hundreds of years in space humans have become so dependant on verbal communication w/ machines that they have forgotten how to read. This is hardly a new idea. Colony by Robert Grant used this same premise to similar humorous effect. Robert Grant wasn't the first one, either. Douglas Adams touched on the idea in one of the Hitchhiker's Guide books, albeit within Arthur Dent's single lifetime while stranded and living alone in a cave. Douglas Adams wasn't the first either. Walter M. Miller had a similar theme as the underlying premise for A Canticle For Liebowitz, though in that case it wasn't dependance on machine but the destruction of modern civilaization in nuclear holocaust that was the cause.

Help Me

2008-06-21T23:29:00.002-05:00

I've been listening to my backlog of TWiT netcasts from the last few months. I had stopped listening to podcasts for a while as I finished listening to the Red Dwarf audiobooks and a few other audiobooks I couldn't wait to hear. Now I've got this huge backlog of podcasts to listen to and I've been consuming them one after the other in reverse chronoligical order (which is a fun brain exercise).

In a May episode of TWiT they touched, once again (groan), on twitter only this time they were discussing a tweeter named "comcastcares" who is an employee of Comcast who started using social media to attempt to assist Comcast customers with their questions and problems.

"Is ********* doing this?" I thought. Well... we are... sort of. The twitter account exists but it is completely dead and entirely unutilized. I'm thinking I'd like to take a stab at this. I think it could be a great way to alleviate some customer frustrations and also has the additional benefit of being a tool for PR. I created my own Twitter ********* themed account, now monitored through digsby and the twitter Opera widget, and, though I don't know exactly how this is going to work, I plan to monitor this for questions and opportunities to make things right for a few people. It seems to me that this could be fun, helpful, and very satisfying. Maybe it'd be like fighting back against "the man" in a way that benefits me, the customer, and "the man" himself.

Thoughts?

Voice Acting

2008-06-21T00:09:00.004-05:00

I had about 400 words concerning my general distain for celebrities trying to take a stab at voice acting and then pointing out the few exceptions where someone was actually good: Mark Hamill, Patrick Warburton, Robin Williams (who I hate but who is a great voice actor), and (the one who inspired me to post this) Phil Lamarr (Hermes Conrad, Vamp from MGS4, and the dude whose head gets splattered by John Travolta in the back of the car in Pulp Fiction). After 400 words I realized I had about 2000 more and decided I just didn't have the energy for a 2400 word rant. I erased it and wrote this instead.

Voice actors you should look up:
Billy West
Maurice LaMarche
Dan Castellaneta
Mark Hamill (Luke Skywalker himself)
Tress MacNeille
David Herman
Frank Welker
Phil LaMarr
Patrick Warburton (Puddy!)
Doc Hammer (not exactly well known for voice acting but... Dr. Girlfriend... Holy Shit!)
H. Jon Benjamin (my favorite. his first appearance on The Venture Bros. had me dying)
Ron Lynch (his voice pops up all over once you know it enough to recognize it)
Chris McCulloch
Brad Garrett (Robert Ramone! His voice is very distinctive and recognizeable so most of his voice acting has been just his regular voice. He's been in so many things over the years but much of it isn't what I would call "choice material." However, if you heard him as Gusteau in Ratatouille, you'll notice he sounded nothing like himself and he was really putting on a voice that couldn't be easily traced back to him. Perhaps he will be able to supplement his regular income from straight-to-DVD Disney crap with some prime gigs.)

There are so many others. Those are just my favorites from a few of my favorite recent shows. Perhaps I should have included Harry Shearer and Hank Azaria in there. There are others on the list that have had careers and fame outside voice acting but the problem is I just don't know what voice acting they've really done outside of The Simpson's. They're both very good and it's possible I've heard them somewhere and not even known it and between them they've delivered something like 67% of my favorite lines from The Simpson's but since I was trying to find the people who do the voices I like on my favorite shows from recent years and, despite the fact that new episodes keep coming out like puss oozing out of a sore, I don't consider The Simpson's to be all that recent.

Not sure how they did this

2008-06-19T09:02:00.000-05:00

But it is cool!

Test

2008-06-18T18:53:00.001-05:00

If it works I might like to take this here widget and make it a permanent addition to the right hand side of this little adventure.

Poison Fountain

2008-06-14T21:56:00.002-05:00

The Speedway stations here (that's like a Super America for you nordic folks) have these devices on their soda fountains that deliver a squirt of flavored syrup in cherry, lemon, or vanilla. You can make your own cherry coke or vanilla dr. pepper or whatever else you can think of. Today I added some lemon to some Sprite. What I didn't know was that this artificial lemon flavor was not lemon flavored at all. It is labelled lemon but it's actually just flavored "yellow." What does yellow taste like? Well... onion paste, alum, and flop sweat from a bad observational comic who eats nothing but garlic and fish paste.

He will never need a zimmer.

2008-06-13T22:51:00.001-05:00

Watched this episode tonight. I had forgotten. Brilliant!

Holla!

2008-05-22T22:42:00.001-05:00

When Stupid People Think They Are Smart

2008-05-19T18:17:00.011-05:00

This whole post is dumb. Very dumb. Stop here and do not read more. I would make this bit a regular feature but, in doing so, I would end up with moi as the prime example. I don't want to make fun of when I do stupid things. I just want to judge others.

The picture is from foundmagazine.com and was the subject of a Digg.com post today. It's funny but not "ha ha" funny. The point of this post is not the picture or the Digg posting itself but rather a comment left by someone on Digg.

Digg user bmcnally states "Fake. I know it's fake 'cause there are no boxes to check for response. Also the shadows are off."

I agree that it's possibly fake as a concept but I hope the comment about shadows is an attempt at irony. I think it's probably genuine as an artifact.

If I was going to fake a handwritten note as a joke for the internet I wouldn't use photoshop.

WTF, Digg!?

2008-05-15T18:57:00.003-05:00

New digg comment system makes Opera crash. Experienced on 2 different machines. Can anyone else verify this is the case on their machines as well? If it's just me I'm at a loss as to why.

Need To $treamline

2008-05-08T21:26:00.004-05:00

Though bathed in the glory of the interwebs and all its sinful ease (Rule #34, I love you.) there are some things I have insisted on doing the old fashioned way. I still write checks, stuff envelopes, lick stamps, update legers, and crunch numbers in order to get the bills paid. I have a fairly high success rate and making sure everything's paid on time and rarely have I ever been late or missed a payment (even if I didn't get a statement in the mail). It's not just bills. All of my financial activites are managed in this way. It's effective but time consuming and boring. I've decided to graduate into the 21st century... ...for free... ...with Web2.0!

So, here are my options, as I see them, in no particular order.

Mint
Geezeo
Wesabe
Yodlee

iWhat do you think? Is anybody using one of these tools? Can anyone recommend one that isn't on the list? They all looks so damned the same (aside from the obvious advantages of the cutesy Web2.0 design of Geezeo... Nailed It!).

Mental Fiber

Remember your childhood?

Who are these guys?

The other day...

8 posts....

Tomorrow is the first day of the end of your year.

All you need is spellchecker!

Netflix via 360 FTW

OK. When the fuck did everyone turn stupid?

If it's going to be that kind of party I'm going to stick my dick in the mashed potatoes.

I woke up on the floor after I read this and my left eyeball was blood red.

Saw this on Digg. .... *shudder*

Funny enough for you?

Phishing Scam Alert...

Alton Brown Was Wrong

Mezzo cut an album?

It's not the Wigsphere...

Oh, no he f---ing didn't!

A Star Wars Fans Dream...

Parkour In Game

Daylight, I Miss You

Decisive

Voter Intimidation

Apparently,

This is from the hearings in Ohio. Nothing ever came of this. Imagine that.

Don't believe everything you're told. Don't even believe this. Go get your own info!

Them's Fightin' Words

I need a Delorean

China at Night

WTF Do I Do For The Poor Kitty??????????

Boat Cruise to Downtown

Redistribution Of Nougat

What type are you?

Celebrity Morph by MyHeritage

Gold!

F-ing Barf

Beggars Night

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Am I Rain Man?

Xbox Live Update 11.19.08

Cincinnatti Time Waste

Beer Tasting????

Oh For Fuck's Sake

My apoligies if you are offended... but...

Puccini's Smiling Teeth Pizza...

Someday We'll Go All The Way

It's Fall...

My reaction to existing in the Bible belt.

I'm out. Done.

Pandemic, I miss you.

When you wish...

Gas Shortages Being Obfuscated?

Mehaffie's Pies

Youtube. Teacher. Mother. Secret Lover.

Why oh why?

Still Alive

Ike got depressed and then tried to kill me.

Ike Hunt Hear You

Storms

I've been cheating....

Apples and String Theory

Team Fortress 2: Bureaucrats invade everything.

DIY Web Comic: Add your own stick figures!

LEGO, please explain this....

Meat Sweats

So...

8tracks.com/whackly

Sorry Mixwit. 8tracks.com is more like what I lost.

Lego My Eggo

Replacement?

Muxtape Nuxxed

I can't make the rant...

Is that a snake in your pocket?

A new hobby project (soon to be abandoned along with the others)

"We will return triumphant to the blog space!!!!" -EzMezzo

Kids are idiots! You can all get di-icked 'cause I've got condoms.

No..... no....... not me...... NOT TO ME!!!!!!!!!!

Surface tension?

That sure would taste good with butter...

Dear Computer browser(s)...

Saw this on Digg. .... shudder